CAUSE OF DEATH
Goblin Token: Born Yesterday, Dead Today
Here we observe the remarkable specimen of Goblin, a token that achieved the impressive feat of losing 84% of its value in a single rotation of the Earth. Born mere hours ago with all the promise of a newborn, it has expired with the grace of a mayfly caught in a bear trap. The authorities may be revoked, but the damage to investor portfolios remains decidedly permanent.
CAUSE OF DEATH
Catastrophic infant mortality from pump-and-dump mechanics
EPITAPH
"It lived fast, died young, and left 202 slightly poorer bag holders wondering if they'd misread the whitepaper during their coffee break."