CAUSE OF DEATH
Newborn Token Flatlines Before First Breath
In the unforgiving savanna of decentralized finance, we observe a remarkable specimen: born mere hours ago, already in the throes of extinction. With 99.7% of its circulating wealth concentrated in the talons of its top predators and liquidity pools as barren as a drought-stricken plain, this creature never stood a chance. One can almost hear the distant cry of retail investors, their life savings scattered across the desiccated landscape.
CAUSE OF DEATH
Extreme concentration, zero liquidity, infant mortality
EPITAPH
"Here lies KEVINHOUSE: a token so centralized, even its funeral was attended by only 22 people—and they're all still holding."