CAUSE OF DEATH
Newborn Token Shows Alarming Vital Signs
In the vast savanna of decentralized finance, we observe a peculiar specimen—born mere hours ago, yet already displaying the frenetic energy of a creature injected with pure adrenaline. The Make Plague Great Again token has achieved what few manage: a price surge of 85.7% before its first sunset, a phenomenon comparable to watching a mayfly discover cryptocurrency. One must admire the sheer audacity, though history suggests this particular dance seldom ends with a gentle fadeout.
CAUSE OF DEATH
Temporal inevitability and mathematical improbability
EPITAPH
"It lived fast, died young, and left a Discord full of conflicting emotions."
