CAUSE OF DEATH
Potatoinu: Born Volatile, Died Immediately
In the beginning, there was chaos. Born mere hours ago, Potatoinu experienced a violent 160% swing—the financial equivalent of a newborn's first seizure. With zero liquidity and 70% of supply concentrated in the hands of the fortunate few, this tuber's existence was less of a blockchain innovation and more of a controlled demolition masquerading as price discovery.
CAUSE OF DEATH
Instant death by structural insolubility
EPITAPH
"It had such potential. Then it didn't. Also, potatoes don't have an 'inu' derivative—this should have been the first red flag."