CAUSE OF DEATH
BigButtcoin: Born Dead, Stayed That Way
Here we observe a specimen so freshly expired, the body is still warm. BigButtcoin entered the world with all the promise of a newborn—authorities revoked, liquidity absent, and precisely two holders sharing ownership like feuding twins over a dead relative's will. In merely hours, it had achieved what some tokens take weeks to accomplish: complete and utter irrelevance.
CAUSE OF DEATH
Catastrophic liquidity failure, extreme concentration, stillbirth
EPITAPH
"It cost $110.94 to learn that 'decentralized' with two holders is just 'centralized with anxiety.'"
